Glimpses of a Mystery 4
Because of my thirst to learn, I used to write down all that I could. Like the proverbial ant, I would struggle to carry away, grain by grain, every bit of His inexhaustible knowledge from the sugar mound that He was. Before each effort I would think, "Next time I will carry away the whole hill." But when I returned, I found that the mound had again grown larger. Finally, realizing that His knowledge was much more than the greatest mountain, I had to throw away the grains and surrender.
When did I stop my pet weakness - intellectual pursuit? It was only in May 1968 during Baba's Renaissance Universal (RU) discourse[7], "Expression and Symbolization". Tens of thousands of Margiis attended this speech. As usual, I was struggling to take notes and finding the topic difficult. By the time I finished writing a few lines, Baba had advanced sentences ahead!
Dropping my pen and paper I thought, "Let me listen, understand and remember as much as possible, and leave the rest." At that moment, a miracle occurred. A blissful feeling spread from my ajina cakra (the psycho-spiritual centre located in the centre of the head). I started to understand and remember nearly everything He was saying.
Baba usually asked for comments after His RU talks, so this time I rushed eagerly to Him. But before I could say anything He asked me, "And why did some intellectual boys throw away their pen and paper?" I said to Baba, “Baba your speech was so deep”. Baba quipped back “How many fathom deep my son”. I was silent , because that reply meant so many things.
Thereafter, bit by bit, Baba enlarged my receptivity. I realized that ego is the arch enemy. When ego does not dominate, then only can He augment one's powers of receptivity. This I experienced, and increasingly I could retain all the important points from His talks. At the same time, a beautiful feeling like a current of light, would penetrate my ajina cakra and anahata cakra (psycho-spiritual centre located in the centre of the chest), bringing tears of happiness. I would become lost in ineffable bliss. After such experiences I never felt like talking; rather I preferred solitude in order to cry and thus soothe the pain of my own pettiness.
I had made myself small and mean by doubting Him. Yet despite everything, this Great Personality bestowed such grace upon me. Years later I understood that these experiences were His application of positive microvita[8] to make my plexi and associated glands more complex so that they could absorb increasingly more subtle and spiritual vibrations.
The wonder was that for many years He was elevating His disciples without them even knowing it. Baba never wanted kudos. He did not want anyone to know that He was giving them something extraordinary. Only on later reflection could the recipient sense something of what had happened. When He enlarged one's receptivity, one would feel that everything in this universe was happening properly and correctly according to the Cosmic Will. After such experiences I would contemplate deeply, and after finally understanding, realization would come.
Occasionally Baba would ask persons more learned than myself to expound on a topic about which He had just spoken. If they failed, He would turn to me. I was always amazed at the beauty and coherence of the explanations coming from my mouth. I knew it was someone else talking through me and I experienced a sense of bliss at my anahata cakra. The intellectuals were amazed that a less educated person could speak so well. After this, I lost the desire to show off my knowledge.
One day out of the blue Baba said to me, "You are a critic. Today I want you to criticize me."
I hesitated because by now I was well aware of my ignorance. I offered a cautious reply. "Baba, Veda Vyasa wrote the Mahabharata through a parrot, so I can never venture to speak about You."
But Baba persisted, "It is My order for you to criticize Me."
So I said, "First, I have read that true mystics used to remain absorbed in samadhi. They found it very difficult to maintain physical parallelism. You are the first person who gives samadhi and yet is never affected by it.
"Second, I found that other philosophers and mystics repeat the same ideas many times. Yet, You never repeat the same idea twice. Even when we request you to repeat something, the repetition always has added fragrance, so it is very difficult to take the latter and leave the former.
"Third, on numerous occasions You have stopped delivering a speech before it was completed because the audience could make neither head nor tail of it. In short, your knowledge has no end.
"For example, when You go to the south of India You select very abstract topics."
He said, "Not the whole south, only Madras."
I continued, "Baba, when you deliver lectures in front of intellectuals, You first start in a tough language with a tough subject. Later, when the listening intellectuals surrender, You tell it in an easy, understandable way. At the end You stress the importance of devotional sadhana." Except a few, all His lectures followed this pattern.
In the first week of January 1968, in Jaipur, Baba started explaining the origin of the swastika and its meaning.
At least a dozen PhD's and heads of departments of different universities were present. The subject was very abstract. After a short time, Baba stopped abruptly. Later, when I asked why, He said, "Nobody was following."
I still remember the main points of this lecture. Baba explained that the first tantrics (spiritual scientists) observed the horizon and drew a horizontal line to represent the Supreme Cognitive Principle (Shiva). Then he gave a vertical line crossing it to represent the causal matrix or Supreme Operative Principle (Shakti). The cross later entered the Bramhi Khraosti scripts as the symbol for the sound "ka". The English letter "k", and "ka" in Hindi and Sanskrit also have similar structures like a cross. When clockwise handles are added to the cross, the swastika of India is formed. It symbolizes the preservation of Creation. The arms represent the anti-clockwise movement of kundalinii. In temples of Shiva, the parikrama or movement around the sanctum is done anti-clockwise to symbolize this, while in other Hindu temples, it is done clockwise.
I remember the subject was very abstract. Until 1979 He delivered most of His discourses in Hindi and English. Some of these were not preserved because of the shortcomings of His disciples. Only a portion of His long life, the twelve years from His release from prison in 1978 to 1990, was meticulously recorded. This is only a portion of the total years He spent touring and teaching in different parts of India and overseas.
Notes:
[7] Baba founded Renaissance Universal (RU) in the late 1950's as a public forum for intellectual discussion and debate of new social and scientific ideas. He served as President of the organization and gave regular discourses on this platform that were later compiled in the series, A Few Problems Solved.
[8] Microvita are subtle, subatomic entities which are the smallest emanations of the Cosmic Faculty. Baba proposed this new scientific concept in 1986.
Because of my thirst to learn, I used to write down all that I could. Like the proverbial ant, I would struggle to carry away, grain by grain, every bit of His inexhaustible knowledge from the sugar mound that He was. Before each effort I would think, "Next time I will carry away the whole hill." But when I returned, I found that the mound had again grown larger. Finally, realizing that His knowledge was much more than the greatest mountain, I had to throw away the grains and surrender.
When did I stop my pet weakness - intellectual pursuit? It was only in May 1968 during Baba's Renaissance Universal (RU) discourse[7], "Expression and Symbolization". Tens of thousands of Margiis attended this speech. As usual, I was struggling to take notes and finding the topic difficult. By the time I finished writing a few lines, Baba had advanced sentences ahead!
Dropping my pen and paper I thought, "Let me listen, understand and remember as much as possible, and leave the rest." At that moment, a miracle occurred. A blissful feeling spread from my ajina cakra (the psycho-spiritual centre located in the centre of the head). I started to understand and remember nearly everything He was saying.
Baba usually asked for comments after His RU talks, so this time I rushed eagerly to Him. But before I could say anything He asked me, "And why did some intellectual boys throw away their pen and paper?" I said to Baba, “Baba your speech was so deep”. Baba quipped back “How many fathom deep my son”. I was silent , because that reply meant so many things.
Thereafter, bit by bit, Baba enlarged my receptivity. I realized that ego is the arch enemy. When ego does not dominate, then only can He augment one's powers of receptivity. This I experienced, and increasingly I could retain all the important points from His talks. At the same time, a beautiful feeling like a current of light, would penetrate my ajina cakra and anahata cakra (psycho-spiritual centre located in the centre of the chest), bringing tears of happiness. I would become lost in ineffable bliss. After such experiences I never felt like talking; rather I preferred solitude in order to cry and thus soothe the pain of my own pettiness.
I had made myself small and mean by doubting Him. Yet despite everything, this Great Personality bestowed such grace upon me. Years later I understood that these experiences were His application of positive microvita[8] to make my plexi and associated glands more complex so that they could absorb increasingly more subtle and spiritual vibrations.
The wonder was that for many years He was elevating His disciples without them even knowing it. Baba never wanted kudos. He did not want anyone to know that He was giving them something extraordinary. Only on later reflection could the recipient sense something of what had happened. When He enlarged one's receptivity, one would feel that everything in this universe was happening properly and correctly according to the Cosmic Will. After such experiences I would contemplate deeply, and after finally understanding, realization would come.
Occasionally Baba would ask persons more learned than myself to expound on a topic about which He had just spoken. If they failed, He would turn to me. I was always amazed at the beauty and coherence of the explanations coming from my mouth. I knew it was someone else talking through me and I experienced a sense of bliss at my anahata cakra. The intellectuals were amazed that a less educated person could speak so well. After this, I lost the desire to show off my knowledge.
One day out of the blue Baba said to me, "You are a critic. Today I want you to criticize me."
I hesitated because by now I was well aware of my ignorance. I offered a cautious reply. "Baba, Veda Vyasa wrote the Mahabharata through a parrot, so I can never venture to speak about You."
But Baba persisted, "It is My order for you to criticize Me."
So I said, "First, I have read that true mystics used to remain absorbed in samadhi. They found it very difficult to maintain physical parallelism. You are the first person who gives samadhi and yet is never affected by it.
"Second, I found that other philosophers and mystics repeat the same ideas many times. Yet, You never repeat the same idea twice. Even when we request you to repeat something, the repetition always has added fragrance, so it is very difficult to take the latter and leave the former.
"Third, on numerous occasions You have stopped delivering a speech before it was completed because the audience could make neither head nor tail of it. In short, your knowledge has no end.
"For example, when You go to the south of India You select very abstract topics."
He said, "Not the whole south, only Madras."
I continued, "Baba, when you deliver lectures in front of intellectuals, You first start in a tough language with a tough subject. Later, when the listening intellectuals surrender, You tell it in an easy, understandable way. At the end You stress the importance of devotional sadhana." Except a few, all His lectures followed this pattern.
In the first week of January 1968, in Jaipur, Baba started explaining the origin of the swastika and its meaning.
At least a dozen PhD's and heads of departments of different universities were present. The subject was very abstract. After a short time, Baba stopped abruptly. Later, when I asked why, He said, "Nobody was following."
I still remember the main points of this lecture. Baba explained that the first tantrics (spiritual scientists) observed the horizon and drew a horizontal line to represent the Supreme Cognitive Principle (Shiva). Then he gave a vertical line crossing it to represent the causal matrix or Supreme Operative Principle (Shakti). The cross later entered the Bramhi Khraosti scripts as the symbol for the sound "ka". The English letter "k", and "ka" in Hindi and Sanskrit also have similar structures like a cross. When clockwise handles are added to the cross, the swastika of India is formed. It symbolizes the preservation of Creation. The arms represent the anti-clockwise movement of kundalinii. In temples of Shiva, the parikrama or movement around the sanctum is done anti-clockwise to symbolize this, while in other Hindu temples, it is done clockwise.
I remember the subject was very abstract. Until 1979 He delivered most of His discourses in Hindi and English. Some of these were not preserved because of the shortcomings of His disciples. Only a portion of His long life, the twelve years from His release from prison in 1978 to 1990, was meticulously recorded. This is only a portion of the total years He spent touring and teaching in different parts of India and overseas.
Notes:
[7] Baba founded Renaissance Universal (RU) in the late 1950's as a public forum for intellectual discussion and debate of new social and scientific ideas. He served as President of the organization and gave regular discourses on this platform that were later compiled in the series, A Few Problems Solved.
[8] Microvita are subtle, subatomic entities which are the smallest emanations of the Cosmic Faculty. Baba proposed this new scientific concept in 1986.
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